by Ben BeEssen

Most Valley City residents weren’t aware until recently that 3 Flock cameras were installed in Valley City. Once they found out, many took to social media demanding the cameras be taken down. The city board meeting that week turned into a circus. Valley City residents felt that the mayor and board of aldermen dismissed their concerns at the meeting, and they have felt they’ve been ignored since then. But, Valley City residents are very happy now, because the cameras have been removed by an unknown man and local hero.

Flock cameras have been in the national headlines recently. They are automated license plate reader (ALPR) systems made by Flock Safety that capture vehicle details and license plates to track movements. Many people didn’t realize that they were even in their cities and communities. Also, some people have been wrongly charged with traffic violations because of the errors of Flock cameras. Most people believe these cameras are an invasion of privacy, and they should be taken down.

The first Flock camera came down 3 weeks ago about 1:50 am. Multiple people took pictures of the camera sitting on the ground after its pole had been sawed in half. People celebrated the incident on social media. The Valley City Police Dept. (VCPD) asked for any information leading to the person responsible, but they have received no leads. Valley City had the camera back up in a couple days. But, it was sawed down a couple days later. Again, the VCPD has no leads, and still hasn’t solved the crime. That camera has not been reinstalled.

The second Flock camera was sawed down last Monday at approximately 2:05 am. The VCPD has no leads or witnesses. Again, Valley City residents were ecstatic about the camera being removed.

The third and final camera was taken care of this Tuesday morning at approximately 2:30 am. VCPD again has no leads or witnesses. VCPD thinks the same person has removed all 3 cameras, but they don’t know that for sure.

VCPD Chief Kojak Griffith said, “These cameras are helping us with public safety. I understand most people don’t want them, but you can’t just tear them down. That’s a crime. We’ll do what we can to find the perpetrator. But, the issue is that no one is cooperating with us. We have no statements from witnesses, and we have no leads. Plus, the perpetrator has been dressed in all black with a mask, so it’s basically impossible to identify him. Y’all need to help us out.”

Valley City residents are thrilled the cameras have been taken down, and they’re having fun giving the perpetrator a nickname.

One person on Facebook said, “This man is a hero! He should be knighted. We should call him Sir De-Flocker. These things are a travesty, and they should’ve never been installed. They did it without our knowledge and approval. If they put them back up, I hope Sir De-Flocker just keeps sawing them down.”

Another Facebook commenter said, “This is so great! This guy is doing a great service to the citizens of Valley City, and I hope no one snitches on him. I can’t decide if I want to call him the Flock Chopper or the Privacy Paladin; I think I like the Privacy Paladin more. The mayor and board of aldermen better start looking for other jobs. We’re gonna replace these bums!”

An anonymous source inside City Hall told me that city officials are not happy about the cameras being vandalized, but my source feels the cameras will not be replaced. If that’s the case, the Valley City residents have won the battle. Power to the people!

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Travel baseball, softball, soccer, and volleyball have become multibillion-dollar industries in America. They all continue to grow throughout the country and throughout The Valley. Many of these organizations are legitimate profitable businesses, and private equity has taken note. Now, a well-known and popular Valley baseball organization has been acquired by a private equity firm out of New York.

Dinger Nation was started by Mark McGwyer 10 years ago. McGwyer had finished up a 6 year career in the minor leagues, and he was looking for something to do after baseball. McGwyer said, “I knew my playing days were over, but I had no idea what I was going to do. My sister recommended starting a travel team for my nephew and his friends. I told her that I would try it, and the first couple years were tough. Before long, one team turned into three, then 5, and we were off to the races. It’s been a lot of fun, and we’ve had some really good players come through Dinger Nation.”

Dinger Nation’s growth and popularity caught the attention of Cheddar Partners, a New York based private equity firm. Cheddar Partners’ VP of Acquisitions, Willie Ackman, said, “This is our first foray into youth sports, and we’re excited about it. To our knowledge, this is the first private equity acquisition of a local travel ball organization. There have been multiple big national organizations that have been acquired by private equity, but not a small local organization like Dinger Nation. We’re looking forward to working with McGwyer and his team to grow and improve the organization even more.”

The dollar value of the acquisition hasn’t been disclosed, but many believe it to be in the 6 figures.

McGwyer added, “Cheddar Partners has promised to infuse more money into the organization for more growth and to attract better coaches. They said they’re not going to change anything right now. I’m going to keep running the organization. Additionally, they’ve worked out agreements with Marucci, Absolutely Ridiculous, Bruce Bolt, and they’ll be more to come. Parents that are looking for a great organization with great coaching with a lot of cheddar, we’re the organization for you!”

Dinger Nation parents have mixed feelings about the acquistion. One dad said, “This is just insane. I can’t believe it. I’m worried that is going to negatively affect Dinger Nation. Is Coach McGwyer still going to have the same fire after getting that big check? How is Cheddar going to change things? I know they said they’re not going to for now, but you know they’re gonna start messing with things at some point. It just seems too good to be true.”

One mom said, “Wow! This is fantastic! We just joined Dinger Nation 2 months ago, and I think we hit the jackpot. Now, Ethan is going to get multiple Marucci bats, sliding gear from Absolutely Ridiculous, and multiple pairs of batting gloves from Bruce Bolt. He’s on cloud nine! Obviously, God was shining down on us.”

Will Dinger Nation be the only organization in The Valley that gets gobbled up by private equity? A couple people have told me they’ve seen multiple out of town guys wearing expensive suits in Valley restaurants in the past week. We shall see.

by I. B. Lyon

We have known for years now that invasive pythons are a problem in Florida and the Everglades. Over the years, people have released their python pets into the wild, and they’ve reproduced and become a major problem. People and organizations have been hunting and killing the snakes for years to protect Florida ecosystems and native species. Now, a Valley farmer has partnered with an organization in Florida to relocate some pythons to his property in The Valley.

Olan “Ole” McDonald has been farming in The Valley for about 35 years, and he owns one of the largest farms in the Strong River Valley. Rodents (mice, beavers, and capybaras) and deer have become a major problem for Mr. McDonald. McDonald said, “Man, I’m so tired of these dang rodents. The capybaras came last year, and they’re driving me crazy now. The deer clean me out every year, and I’m just tired of it. I know people don’t want these pythons around here, but I had to do something.”

McDonald has partnered with the Everglades Invasive Species Removal Coalition (EISRC) and their Python Relocation Program (PRP) to bring pythons to his property. The EISRC is a no kill organization, so they’re always looking for places to relocate pythons and other species. Farmers have become frequent partners with their PRP program to cut down on rodents and other nuisance species.

I could not reach the EISRC for comment. Mr. McDonald declined to provide any information about the number of snakes and size of the snakes he is going to receive. However, he did inform me that he would be receiving multiple snakes next week.

Valleyans are not happy about the situation. One of McDonald’s neighbors said, “This is crazy! I’m so ticked off I can’t see straight. How is this legal? Now, I’m worried about my dogs; they go on his property all the time. We have some goats too. I’m worried a python may get one of them too. Somebody has got to stop this!”

Another Valleyan said, “I called the wildlife folks, and they said there’s nothing they can do about it because it’s his private property. This is scary and insane! All our dang animals are gonna start disappearing. I love to hunt deer and turkey, and those pythons are gonna start eating them. I still can’t believe this. I swear I’m in a dream.”

Multiple residents have promised to block the EISRC folks from releasing the snakes. They’re setting up 24 hour watch teams to locate any vehicles with Florida license plates. It will be interesting to see how this plays out.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Many high schools are installing synthetic turf football and baseball fields these days. They require a large upfront investment, but they can be cheaper in the long run. They cut out the need for watering, mowing, fertilizing, and other maintenance. Plus, they look really nice and clean, and kids enjoy playing on them.

Strong River Bend (SRB) High Baseball started construction on their turf installation on Monday, and it has already been halted. Construction workers were doing some dirt work, and a worker discovered what appeared to be human bones. The crew stopped working, and they called the school principal, Dr. Dick Belding. Dr. Belding then called the police. SRB Police examined the bones, and they thought the bones were possibly hundreds of years old. So, they called the Mississippi Archaeological Society (MAS) to inspect the area.

Dr. Belding said, “I was shocked when the construction foreman called me about the bones. I didn’t have this on my 2026 bingo card. To be safe, I called the police for them to check it out. The bones looked really old, but you never know. When Jones Indiana with the MAS got here and looked it over, he told me that he was pretty sure our field was built on an Indian burial ground. He said we’d need to halt construction for a while for them to check it out. Indiana and his crew are coming Monday to get started. I hope it doesn’t take long, but I have no idea at this point.”

The turf was supposed to be ready to go by mid- December in time for the 2027 baseball season, but no one knows at this point. The archaeological dig could last 2 days, or it could last 2 months.

SRB Baseball Coach Sparky Granderson said, “The kids are I are pumped up about this turf field, so we weren’t thrilled to learn the news. But, it is what it is. This could explain why our program hasn’t been very good historically. We’ve said on multiple occasions that the baseball gods just haven’t been too kind to us. Well, maybe the Indian gods cursed us. Maybe that’s been the problem. Hopefully, we won’t have to worry about that going forward.”

The SRVO will keep you updated on the archaeological dig and the progress of the baseball field.

by Heeza de Seaver

Riverbend Roastery is a hot spot in The Valley. The Strong River Bend (SRB) coffee shop sees a ton of traffic in the mornings as people stop on their way to work to get coffee and other drinks. People also love their breakfast. But, the beloved coffee shop is making the news now for an unfortunate event.

Workers arrived for work on Tuesday morning to discover the building had been egged. They also noticed that their large sign promoting their pumpkin spice coffee drinks had been vandalized.

Owner Jo Lahtaye said, “This is so unfortunate. We’ve never had anything like this happen to us. We’ve never had anything stolen, and we’ve never had anything vandalized. I reviewed our camera footage, and it’s very difficult to make heads or tails of it. The guy did all this around 3:00 am, and I could tell it was a male. We’ve turned it over to the police, so we’ll see what happens.”

Valleyans have taken to social media to discuss the incident, and the posts are all over the map. But, one common theme is that many people feel the perpetrator was angry about the pumpkin spice sign. People feel that Riverbend Roastery was selling pumpkin spice drinks way too early in the fall.

One commenter said, “I love this coffee shop. I go by there 2-3 times per week, and it’s always great. But, it’s way too early to start selling pumpkin spice drinks. It’s still like 90 degrees outside. How the heck can you sell pumpkin spice drinks now? You gotta wait until the weather cools off. I guess that’s why the person vandalized their stuff?”

Another commenter said, “I hate to say it, but they got what they deserved. How can you be selling pumpkin spice drinks now? Plus, pumpkin spice is so overrated. To be honest, it sucks! I bet these people start putting their Christmas decorations up on November 1st. I don’t wanna condone vandalism, but I understand why the guy did what he did.”

Riverbend Roastery vows to put up another pumpkin spice sign and continue offering their pumpkin spice drinks. Lahtaye said, “We can’t let one bad apple scare us. I hope this will actually help us to sell more pumpkin spice drinks. We’re received a ton of support from this; it has rallied our customers to support us even more.”

by Ima Phibber

Things are booming in the Strong River Valley aka The Valley these days. Developments, houses, restaurants and more are springing up all the time. The Valley has had an influx of retirees from California, New York, and other states. We’ve had some move from Florida, Tennessee and Texas to escape a second time from the rising cost of living in those states. The latest sign that things are going well is that a nudist resort is opening in The Valley.

The resort will be named Breezy Bottoms Resort & Retreat, and it will be built on the Strong River within 40B. Construction was started two months ago, and the resort plans to open by Oct. 31st. The resort plans to cater to retirees, and it will have an array of amenities to attract nudists from The Valley and surrounding areas.

Breezy Bottoms owner Buck Knaykead said, “We moved to The Valley 5 years ago from California to enjoy our retirement. We bought some land along the river about a year ago, and we had no plans for it at that time. My wife and I talked about it, and we decided to build a nudist resort. We visited one frequently in California, and there was nothing like it around here. So, here we are.”

Breezy Bottoms will be like a fancy chic RV park. It will have pads for RVs and campers, and it will also have yurts and glamping pods. It will also have a large main building for dining and events, and it will have multiple meeting rooms to accommodate corporate events. Additionally, it will have a few pickleball courts. The beach along the river should be a very nice as well.

I was able to talk to some Valleyans about Breezy Bottoms, and I got mixed feelings on the resort. One widow said, “Oooh! This is so exciting. I’ve been out West to a few nudist resorts and beaches, and I had great experiences. I never thought we’d have a place like this in The Valley. It’s just so enriching to be able to be yourself in the nude, and it gives you such a feeling of freedom. It’s just hard to explain. Plus, I’m hoping there might be some good-looking, rich male nudists that hang out there too. I’ve been alone for 3 years now, so it’s time to find a man.”

One mom said, “I’m not happy about this. Our family loves swimming, fishing, and kayaking in the river close to the resort. I don’t really want my kids to see a bunch of old naked hippies when we’re at the river. They’d be scarred for life. Can the county stop this thing from being built? If not, I’m hoping there will be certain hours or days when nudity is not allowed. It’s just crazy this is happening around here.”

Despite the mixed feelings of Valleyans, the resort is definitely going to be built. Most Valleyans are just now finding out about it. There’s been a lot of talk about it on social media the past few weeks. Despite the controversy, Valleyans want growth and progress, and sometimes growth and progress can be a little messy. Breezy Bottoms is definitely a sign of growth and progress.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Multiple college football programs have recently announced sponsorship deals with large corporations, and there will definitely be more to come. A couple high profile programs that announced deals include Notre Dame and Ohio State. Notre Dame announced a sponsorship deal with SoFi reportedly worth $18-20 million per year; Ohio State announced a deal with JP Morgan Chase worth $17 million per year. This has been happening in pro sports across the globe for years, but it’s just now starting in college football. Well, it has now trickled down to high school football in The Valley.

Every high school sports team is looking for additional ways to raise funds; it’s a never-ending process. Valley City High School football has decided to copy the college football programs with the jersey patch. They have inked a deal with Trudy’s Trendy Boutique reportedly worth 4 figures, but the actual amount will not be made public.

Valley City Head Coach Jeff Fedora said, “We’re excited about our deal with Trudy’s. Trudy’s has been a sponsor for our program for 5 years now, and we’re excited to continue that partnership. We put this out to the highest bidder, and they stepped up big for us. Their sponsorship will allow us to buy some much needed equipment for our program. We’re very grateful for Trudy’s.”

While all the details of the sponsorship haven’t been made public, we do know some of the details. Trudy’s will have their logo on the team’s jerseys. They’ll have a small logo on both 25 yard lines. Also, they will setup a pop-up shop at all home games to sell their merchandise. Additionally, they will do fun giveaways at halftime of home games. They will also have signs setup on the fence along the field as well.

While it seems Coach Fedora and the administration is happy with the sponsorship deal, many Valley City supporters are not. A player’s father said, “Football is peak masculinity. It is absolute war out there. Man on man, mano y mano. It’s like modern day gladiators fighting in a Roman forum. This is a slap in the face to our boys to have to wear the patch of a lady’s boutique on their jerseys. Look, my wife and daughter spend a ton of money in there, and we love Trudy. But, this is so embarrassing and demoralizing to our team. I’m gonna plead with Coach Fedora to reopen the bids, and I’m gonna pray another company outbids Trudy’s.”

An anonymous football player said, “This is just downright embarrassing. I understand we need more money, and I understand Trudy’s was the highest bidder. But, I just can’t. That patch is gonna somehow come off my jersey before I walk out the locker room. I just can’t do it. I may get into trouble, but I don’t care. Everyone loves Mrs. Trudy, but dang! Come on man!”

With Valley City High announcing this deal with Trudy’s, I feel confident there will be more to come. Many don’t like the commercialization of high school sports, but I’m afraid that ship is about to sail.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

The Valley is a sports crazy place. We really love our football, baseball, softball, and volleyball, and we like basketball too. But, the love has grown to an obsession for some. There is a growing trend where parents hold their kids back in junior high so they can grow and mature an extra year to help them in sports. It’s a sad state of affairs, but this has now happened at Strong River Bend (SRB) High.

A SRB teacher alerted me to the fact that there is only two boys in the 9th grade at SRB High this school year. They told me that the reason was almost all the boys were held back in 8th grade for sports (mostly baseball). The teacher said the parents started discussing it in the spring, and they all were on board except two.

I was able to catch up with SRB High Principal Dr. Dick Belding. Belding said, “Yes, I’m fully aware of this, and I’m not crazy about it. But, the parents ultimately have control over their kids, and they make the decision whether to hold them back or not. We had to expand the size of our 8th grade classes because of this crap, and our teachers aren’t happy about that. We’ll manage as best we can.”

One father of a boy that was held back said, “I really didn’t want to hold Jaxsen back. I thought it was retarded, but all his buddies got held back. He’s on the small side, and we have him on that HGH. So, it’ll give him another year to grow and mature. I do think it will help him with baseball a good bit. But, he’s not going to learn anything new in the classroom. His mom kept at me about him staying with his buddies, so I went along with it.”

A mom of one of the two boys that moved onto 9th grade said, “This is so ridiculous. My son doesn’t play sports; he’s in the band. So, this has never crossed my mind. I just can’t fathom doing this. I’ve heard most of those boys suck at baseball anyway. One good thing about it for Jody is that he’ll have a much better chance of getting a girlfriend this year. He won’t have to deal with those cocky baseball punks.”

SRB is the first school in The Valley that has had an issue with this trend. Will other schools have to deal with it too? We shall see.

by I. B. Lyon

It’s back to school time! People generally either love or hate this time of year. Many kids are ready to go back to school, and some are dreading it. Many parents are excited to get their kids out of the house, and many educators are dreading it. Now, one thing you have to deal with for a couple weeks is the bombardment of back to school pictures on social media. Tons of parents post cute first day of school pictures with info about their kiddos. Some go all out with fancy boards, and some parents just force their kids to hold up a piece of paper with the grade their entering into.

The Strong River Bend (SRB) police were called to do a wellness check on the Auffgridder family. Neighbors had not seen the kids in quite a while. Multiple anonymous callers said they hadn’t seen any back to school pictures, and they were concerned about the kids’ wellbeing.

The Auffgridders made some lifestyle changes late last year. They decided to start homesteading and homeschooling their 4 kids.

The father and breadwinner Ben Auffgridder said, “We made some major lifestyle changes late last year. My wife quit her job, and she started homeschooling the kids. We also bought some chickens, goats, cows, and pigs to be self sufficient and homestead. We don’t go out to eat anymore. The kids really only go to church and a few other places. Plus, we live way off the road in the woods. My wife and I got off social media, so I guess people just don’t see much of us anymore. But, we’re all doing fine.”

An anonymous neighbor said, “I realized that I haven’t seen the Auffgridder kids in a while when I started seeing all the back to school pics. Susie would always post the cutest pics of the kids going back to school, and I thought that something had to be wrong. But, it’s good to know they’re all doing well. I had no idea they’d started homeschooling and gone all granola on us.”

by Emma Embellischer

Billy’s Quik Stop is a happening spot in Valley City. Of course, people are always stopping to get gas, because they normally have the cheapest gas in town. But, everyone loves their food too. They have great biscuits in the morning, and they have great plate lunches at lunch time. Their fried chicken and pizza sticks are pretty hard to beat too. They’ve recently added a new and unlikely food item that has taken The Valley by storm- sushi.

In the past, the late afternoon and evening was the slowest time at Billy’s, but it is a happening place from 5:00- 6:00 pm now. People are stopping by in droves to pick up sushi on their way home from work. At times, it can be hard to find a parking place in the evenings now. Evidently, Valley City residents have been craving a sushi spot, and now they have one.

Billy’s Quik Stop owner Billy Beech said, “My long-time worker, Bertha Buroda, had asked me couple times about making sushi to sell. I thought she was crazy. She’s been eating it lately at the Great Wall Chinese Buffet, and she loves it. She watched some YouTube videos on how to make it, and we gave it a whirl. I’ve never eaten the stuff in my life, so I was pretty skeptical. Well, the people are loving it. Now, Bertha makes sushi just about the whole time she’s working. We sell out most days. It’s crazy!”

Beech added, “I was kind of nervous once she started making all this sushi, because she’s my best fried chicken cook. That woman can make some great fried chicken and chicken livers. But, one of my other girls has really stepped up with the chicken. Bertha has really embraced this. She wears one of those Japanese hats and Japanese clothes. Who would’ve thought you’d see this in a gas station in Valley City?”

Bertha makes a lot of the sushi staples like California rolls, spicy tuna rolls, and Philadelphia rolls. But, she’s created a few special rolls that Valleyans love including the catfish tempura roll. She can’t make enough of the catfish tempura rolls. Many times, people have waited for 30 plus minutes just to get a catfish tempura roll. Also, she makes some great pink sauce; customers are requesting containers of it now too.

A Billy’s customer said, “We don’t drive to Jackson or Flowood anymore for sushi. We got the best sushi around just a couple minutes from the house now. Bertha is the best! That catfish tempura roll is to die for! I stop by on my way home and pick it up a couple times a week. I add a little hot sauce to that pink sauce and dip in there. Heaven can’t be much better! I’m tellin you!”

Another customer added, “My friend told me about the sushi at Billy’s, and I thought she was crazy. I told her that I ain’t eatin no sushi from a gas station. I know Billy’s has got some good food, but sushi? Really? Well, I finally tried it, and I’m hooked. We ate it last night. My kids, who don’t eat much more than mac and cheese and chicken nuggets, even like it.”

Right now, Bertha just has a small kiosk in the store, but Billy is planning to remove a cooler of two to enlarge the sushi area to meet their demand. If you haven’t tried the sushi at Billy’s, it’s time to get down there and try it out!